Post 227: If X then Y
Posted on Fri Feb 28th, 2025 @ 3:41am by Lieutenant Commander Michael McMahon & Lieutenant Paul Eschenauer
728 words; about a 4 minute read
Mission: Secrets
Mike was sitting at the small desk, a cup of coffee half-drunk in his hand, staring at the starfield beyond the window. His thoughts were heavy, swirling around the same frustrations that had been building over the past few months. The door chime rang, breaking his silence.
"Come in," Mike called, not looking up from the window.
The door slid open, and Paul Eschanauer stepped in. He leaned against the doorframe, sensing his friend's mood before even speaking.
"You look like you’ve got the weight of the universe on your shoulders," Paul remarked, stepping fully into the room and taking a seat across from Mike.
Mike sighed, setting the cup down with a soft clink. "You could say that. You ever have one of those days where everything you say just... falls flat?" His voice was tinged with frustration.
Paul raised an eyebrow. "You mean more than usual? Yeah, I know that feeling." He chuckled lightly, trying to ease the tension.
Mike shot him a look, but it was devoid of malice. "I’m serious, Paul. Every time I bring up an idea, something that should be considered, it gets shot down. Every damn time. Doesn't matter how solid the plan is, or how much thought I put into it. No one listens."
Paul sat up straight. "Who’s shooting your ideas down? I know you don’t get along with some of the higher-ups, but surely someone’s got your back."
Mike shook his head, frustration building again. "It’s not just one person. It’s all of them. And then there’s the whole promotion thing—everyone else is moving up. Hell, everyone around me seems to get promoted, but here I am, stuck at Lieutenant Commander. What does it take to get a break around here?"
He stood up, pacing around the small room. "It’s like I'm invisible, Paul. Every time I try to make a difference, it’s like I’m just... not worth their time. They all get their promotions, their recognition, while I’m still fighting to be seen."
Paul watched his friend carefully. "Mike, I get it. I do. But you’re not invisible. You’ve been doing some amazing work, and eventually, someone’s going to take notice. You can’t just let them get you down like this."
Mike paused, letting out a long breath. "Maybe I’m just done, Paul. I keep putting my ideas out there, and I keep getting shot down. Maybe it’s not worth the effort anymore."
Paul looked at him, trying to read him. "Don’t say that, Mike. You’re better than that."
Mike chuckled bitterly. "Maybe they’ve got it out for me. Maybe that’s why I’m still a Lieutenant Commander after all these years of trying. Maybe I’m just not cut out for this." He turned to face Paul, his expression flat. "I’m just going to stay quiet from now on. They want to keep ignoring me? Fine. Let them."
Paul frowned. "Come on, don’t do that. You can’t just give up."
Mike shook his head. "No more fighting for a seat at the table. I’ll keep doing my job, but I’m done pushing my ideas. If they can’t see the value in what I bring, then I’m not going to waste my time anymore."
There was a long silence between them, the weight of Mike’s words hanging heavy in the air.
Paul stood up, moving closer. "Look, I get it. It’s frustrating. But you’re too good at what you do to just give up. Don’t let them win like that. You’ve earned your spot here, Mike."
Mike’s gaze softened a little, but the frustration still lingered. "I don’t know anymore. Maybe this is just how it’s always going to be for me."
Paul gave him a long look, then clapped a hand on his shoulder. "You’re not alone in this, Mike. But you’ve gotta do what feels right for you."
Mike nodded quietly, his mind still a whirl of frustration. "Thanks, Paul. I appreciate it."
As Paul left, Mike remained at the window, the stars outside as distant as the hope that had once been a fire inside him. Maybe it was time to just let go.
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